RENO - February is National Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, a time to focus on how abusive behavior impacts teens and the people who care about them.
From a national perspective, approximately one in three teen girls in the United States is a victim of physical, emotional or verbal abuse from a dating partner. (Davis, et al 2008.)1 This abusive behavior is established to exert power and control over a young person and forms a pattern that may include hitting, punching, kicking, sexual assault, making threats, name calling, spreading rumors, telling malicious lies, controlling what the person does, wears, where to go, who she/he sees and talks to and using technology (cell phones and social networking sites) to bully, harass, intimidate or stalk. People age 18 and 19 experience the highest rates of stalking (Baum, et al 2009.)2 and young people age 12 to 19 experience the highest rates of rape and sexual assault (Truman, et al 20120.)3
Teens are reluctant to seek help for many reasons that may include a hope that the abuser will change, having a strong emotional bond with the abuser, being embarrassed or worried about being judged, convinced that they are to blame, a feeling of being trapped with no way to escape and fear of retaliation, harassment, rejection and bullying and not knowing that help is available.
"Early identification and intervention is key to preventing teen dating violence," says Sue Meuschke, NNADV executive director. "Discussing the 'red flags' or warning signs of abuse and encouraging our young people to seek help from adults they trust and community-based advocacy programs is tantamount to eliminating this form of abuse."
For people that want to help teens, don't be afraid to reach out and tell them you are concerned for their safety and want to help. Be supportive and listen patiently while acknowledging their feelings and being respectful of their decisions. Abuse is not "normal" behavior and it is not their fault. Everyone deserves a healthy, non-violent relationship. Share with teens hotlines/helplines that specifically address dating violence and are always anonymous and confidential. Connect teens to resources for information, guidance, safety planning and remind the teen, that if she/he is in immediate danger, calling 9-1-1 is an important option.
1 For complete citations, visit the "Get the Facts" section of the Futures Without Violence website: www.futureswithoutviolence.org.
2 Ibid.
3 Ibid.
Hotlines/helplines
National Dating Abuse Helpline: (866) 331-9474; TTY (866) 331-8453; www.loveisrespect.org.
This helpline operates 24/7 and offers translation and online chat with a trained peer advocate from 4 p.m. to midnight CST.
National Domestic Violence Hotline: (800) 799-SAFE (7233); TTY (800) 787-3224; www.thehotline.org.
This hotline provides crisis intervention, safety planning, information and referrals.
National Sexual Assault Hotline: (800) 656-HOPE (4673); www.rainn.org.
Callers are directed to on-duty volunteers to answer questions, provide support and local resources.
GLBT (Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender) National Youth Talkline: Call or visit website for hours of operation. (800) 246-PRIDE (7743); www.glnh.org/talkline.
Nevada Statewide Hotline: (800) 500-1556.
Winnemucca Domestic Violence Services: (775) 625-1313 or 24/7 Hotline: (775) 421-1028.
General websites on dating abuse
That's Not Cool is a public education initiative to prevent teen dating abuse. It focuses on preventing controlling or abusive behavior occurring within the digital universe - online, via cell phone, etc. - and encourages teens to draw their own lines about what is, or is not, acceptable relationship behavior. www.thatsnotcool.com; www.futureswithoutviolence.org.
Break the Cycle is a leading voice for teens on the issue of dating violence, advocates for policy and legislative changes that will better protect the rights and promote the health of teens nationwide. www.breakthecycle.org; www.loveisrespect.org.
Teens Experiencing Abusive Relationships (TEAR) is a teen-run organization to educate schools and organizations. www.teensagainstabuse.org.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention; www.cdc.gov/chooserespect.
Winnemucca Domestic Violence Services www.winnemuccadvs.org.
Websites on digital abuse and technology
www.teenangels.org - Students age 13 - 18; volunteers trained in online safety, privacy and security and cyberbullying. www.wiredsafety.org; www.stopcyberbullying.org.
The Nevada Network Against Domestic Violence was founded in 1980 to work toward the elimination of domestic and sexual violence against all persons. As Nevada's statewide coalition, NNADV is an inclusive network which both supports member programs, and educates the public at large. The agency is based in Reno, but member programs span the entire state. NNADV's member program in Humboldt County is Winnemucca Domestic Violence Services. Please contact them for further information or to schedule a Teen Dating Violence Awareness Presentation.
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