Society traditionally sees domestic violence among a man and a woman with the women as the primary victim. Ninety-three percent of WDVS primary victims are female, 3 percent are male and 1 percent is LGBTQIA. However, domestic violence happens in several dynamics, it can also be a woman against a man; homosexual, bisexual and transgender (LGBTQIA) couples.
Signs and symptoms found in LGBTQIA relationships are similar to those seen in heterosexual relationships. This can include physical, sexual, financial, emotional and/ or psychological violence.
According to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention of Diseases) same-sex couples suffering from domestic violence are at the same level or slightly higher than a heterosexual couple at experiencing abuse.
Both heterosexual and same sex victims of domestic violence can experience similar patterns and characteristics of abuse although with notable distinctions.
Similarities include:
• The pattern of abuse includes an escalating cycle of physical, emotional, and psychological abuse, leaving victims with feelings of isolation, fear and guilt.
• Abusers and or the victim possibly were themselves abused as children.
• Psychological or emotional abuse is the most common form of abuse and leaves no physical marks leaving deep scares.
• Abusers who use physical means often blackmail their partners into silence.
• Physical and sexual abuse is often inflicted on the victim.
• Abusers may threaten to take the children of the victim.
• No race, ethnicity, sexual orientation or socioeconomic status is exempt.
There are several aspects of same sex relationships that need to be understood by everyone due to the fact that domestic violence is often experienced differently by couples of the same-sex.
Differences may include:
• Same sex abusers threaten their victims with "outing" them with co-workers, family and friends. This threat is amplified by the sense of extreme isolation among victims because some are still in the closet for family and friends.
• LGBTQIA victims may have fewer protections of civil rights, and feel they have no access to the legal system.
• LGBTQIA victims are often reluctant to report the abuse to law enforcement authorities. Survivors don't feel comfortable contacting law enforcement, since doing so could require them to disclose their sexual orientation or gender identity and they often feel law enforcement will not take them seriously.
• LGBTQIA victims are also reluctant to seek help for fear of lack of solidarity among the gay and lesbian community. Similarly, many LGBTQIA individuals hide their abuse for fear that society will perceive that same sex relationships as inherently dysfunctional.
• LGBTQIA victims are more likely than heterosexual women to defend themselves. This can lead law enforcement officials to come to the conclusion that the fight was mutual, overlooking the broader context of domestic violence and the history of power and control in the relationship.
• Abusers may threaten to take the children of the victim. In some states, adoption laws do not allow same-sex parents to adopt each other's children. This can leave the victim without legal rights if the couple separates. The abuser can easily use children as a means to prevent the victim from leaving or seek help. Even when the victim is the legally recognized parent an abuser may threaten to "out" the victim to social workers hostile to LGBTQIA, which may result in a loss of custody. In the worst cases the children can even end up in the custody of the abuser.
Huffington Post reported that two in five gay or bisexual men will experience intimate partner violence (IVP) in their lifetime. Fifty percent of lesbian women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime. Twenty-one LGBT people were killed by their partners in 2013 in the U.S. Fifty percent of them were people of color. This is the highest documented domestic violence homicide in the LGBT community in history.
Domestic violence against the LGBTQIA community can have devastating effects. Although you cannot stop the abusive behavior of your partner, you can get help/resources that will assist you if you want to leave. Remember, no one deserves to be abused.
We encourage anyone living with domestic violence to make positive changes in their lives. WDVS can provide assistance and support while moving towards a life free of violence for you and your children. Please call WDVS at the office: (775) 625-1313 or our 24/7 hotline at (775) 421-1028.[[In-content Ad]]
